At The Cinema

Trailer for the next Harry Potter Film.

“…you must choose between what is right, and what is easy.” – Dumbledore to Harry.

Charlie & The Chocolate Factory.

Charlie regards Veruca getting the ticket by her father buying tens of thousands of bars and getting his workers to open them all as unfair. Mike Teevee just hacks Wonka’s numeric system to predict where to find a ticket.

“Only a dummy would give this up for something as common as money” – Grandpa George, regarding Charlie’s one of the five golden tickets.

Willy Wonka is an IP maximalist. he fires all his workers because of industrial espionage and replaces them with a tribe of servile addicts, who at least won’t go to the competition. 🙂

“Why is everything so pointless?” – Mike Teevee, unimpressed by the factory.

“It doesn’t have to have a point, that’s why it’s candy!” – Charlie.

Imagine releasing everlasting gobstoppers onto the market. The displacement! 🙂

Someone once told me about how they thought they could get the food out of the telly as a child living in a council house. The scene with the TV chocolate hasn’t seemed so funny since then.

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Posted in Free Culture, Satire